Diary of a Bridge Pro #14

​ Collectively, our society suffers from a lack of a universal popular culture. In the background on my laptop as I revise this blog I had a cavalcade of Catskill Comedians cascading through. Funny guys.

  That scene was at its apex in the sixties and seventies - when I started playing tournaments we still had congresses in the Catskill Mountains, in Liberty, New York, a straight shot up the Thruway from the city. For years the tournaments were held at Grossinger’s, then at a slightly lesser resort, The Pines. 

  Both of them dust and ashes but still we play on.

  I’m not bothered that those institutions are gone - that’s what happens to institutions. I am bothered that there’s not much of a scene any more - no active regional circuit, no active money clubs, the few remaining vibrant bridge clubs, in New York or South Florida, ethereal shadows of their former selves. 

  The absence of a common popular culture compounds the problem - to have to explain who Henny Youngman was, or Rodney Dangerfield, or Lenny Bruce - it kills the whole bit.

  *****

  Coping with change is difficult for most of us. All of us deal with this problem. I try to allow and invite mystical elements to enter my life, I accept random events as direction from the cosmos.

  Still trying to find my way, and hoping that these essays might help you find yours.
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  Whole lotta convergence going on - here’s Elvis on the subject:

 Everyone loves Gazilli, right? It strikes me as an unplayable method - what does responder bid after 1S - 1NT - 2C - ? with Q, Jxxx, Kxxxx, xxx - 

  I just looked into Gazilli a bit more - the whole thing makes no sense to me. Consider:

  The bidding begins 1S - 1NT - 2C - this 2C bid shows “Either clubs in a spade-club hand, or artificial, with 16+ - 

  Sounds plausible, so far - almost plausible, anyway. Stay with me, it gets better:

 How do we continue after this miracle panacea, the 2C re-bid after 1S - 1NT - ? With more artificiality, naturally - Responder can bid 2D, also artificial - Opener showed 16+, responder showed 8+, we deem ourselves to have adequate values for game and now we can have the long leisurely auction that modern players so relish. Now we can dance around indefinitely and eventually play in some game contract. Groovy! Best thing to come along since sliced bread and the Two-Over-One Bidding System.

  What about those cases when responder has fewer than 8 points? Well, then, he simply makes some natural bid over 2C, anything besides 2D.  

  As a practical matter, responder will often bid 1NT with fewer than 6 HCP - certainly we wouldn’t want him to pass with Void, ATxxxx, xxxx, xxx. We play along with the dogma and accept that responder needs 6 HCP to bid 1NT in response to partner’s One Spade Opening.

  Certainly any of these three hands are mandatory responses:

  X, Jxxx, Qxxxx, Kxx - void, QJxx, Kxxxx, xxxx - J, QT9x, K98xx, Jxx - 

  Unless I’m missing something, then using Gazilli, there is no possible bid for any of those rather commonplace hands after 1S - 1NT - 2C. 

  So basically it’s a totally unplayable convention. Then why do so many glamorous bridge stars, both Italian and American, play it?

  It’s the marketing, Moshe, it’s the marketing!

  *****

  My father would have been 100 years old earlier this week, he had at least three core thoughts I want to pass along to readers here - he liked to kind of speak these to me as an aside, he didn’t mind being overheard by another family member, but he didn’t want to be challenged on the point - he just wanted to be sure I got it:

  “Brian,” he sometimes told me, “Always remember this:”

  Had I been a more astute and present son, I would have been able to interject, “Remember what, dad?” 

  Rather, I was rather a sullen lout, brain-dead before my time, distant and detached almost before it was a thing - undaunted, he would bull ahead, thus:

  “Just because everybody says something is so, that doesn’t make it so.”

  *****
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  Speaking of Gazilli, on the third-to-last round of the Platinum Pairs, I kibitzed Nick Nickell and Ralph Katz play this board - Board 23:

​  Responder holds Void, Txx, Kxxx, KT9xxx. Partner openss One Spade, you respond 1NT, partner bids 2C, Gazilli.

  In this case responder’s hand is easily biddable playing Gazilli, unlike those I cited earlier. Even with fewer than 8 points, with six card club length responder has a happy 3C bid available over Opener’s artificial 2D.

 At the table, Katz, having opened with One Spade holding AQJxxx, AQx, AQx, passed 3C, and found himself declarer, in light of his artificial 2C rebid over 1NT. For a fleeting moment I thought I had finally witnessed the deal that I’d been seeking for decades - a hand where you “needed Gazilli”.
​
  But no: Without Gazilli, you’d probably play in 3S or 3NT - either of which is about as good (or bad) a contract as 3C. There is an interesting aspect to the spade suit on this deal. 

  Considering the actual suit, you might want to play the ace and then low on the second round of the suit. This will allow you to lose one fewer trick in the suit when it breaks five-two, with the king doubleton.

  The chance of a 5-2 split with the king doubleton is about four percent (14% x 28%).

  If we added as little as the eight to that suit, there would be more to be said for banging the suit from the top, as you usually would. Primarily because you have an excellent chance to find the ten-nine tripleton - around 7%, I’m estimating. 

  You’ll have to consider the whole hand: If you can assure your contract with four tricks in this suit, then ace and then low gets the nod.

  Few players can conduct that line of reasoning and then follow it at the table, even without precise percentages. If you’re one of  those players, simply play for most tricks - the reason to do this is simple:

  The best play for some specific, lesser number of tricks (nine tricks to make three no trump safely, say) is almost always the same as the best play for the most tricks possible.  

  Pro Tip / Executive Summary:
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  At matchpoints, forget about “Safety Plays” - just go for maximum tricks on every hand. It will make your life way simpler and you’ll win more tournaments. Your partners will appreciate it, too. What’s not to like?

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